I've been wanting to write this for several days now and have just put little Ellie down for a nap to be able to. I'm so very thankful for everything in my life these days, what a blessing to have family, friends, community surrounding us, supporting us and encouraging us every step of the way. Ellie's birth was the most beautiful, wonderful, incredible event I have ever experienced. I replay it almost every day in my mind. A lady at my work calls babies "everyday miracles". They happen everyday and it is a blessing to see them as miracles. I think now that I have been through the pregnancy and birth experience, my sense of trust and miracles has heightened. Chris and I pray everyday that Ellie would be just what her name means, a light. We pray for her to be a light that shines the love of God and opens other people's minds and hearts to miracles.
It started the weekend before March 4, I had just finished state testing at school and really was hoping that the weekend would be Ellie's birthday. When the weekend came and went, I was one grumpy camper. I was huge, waddling, sleepless and apprehensive. The past nine months held so much anticipation and wondering...we were just ready to experience the good and the bad...just no more waiting! Tuesday afternoon I called Andrea and complained to her on my way to Jazzercise. "Will it be soon?" She asked. I replied that I had given up hope of even having a baby on her due date and was sure it was going to be quite awhile. In fact, every day after school since February 1st I had been leaving everything in perfect order, laid out and planned for my sub...just in case. This afternoon, however, I left my slippers under the desk, a baby gift next to my chair and papers scattered across my desk. I was tired of preparing. That night, I noticed my back was especially sore but attributed it to the weight of waiting...Not so. About two o'clock in the morning I woke up with really bad back pain but had been through this several times over the past couple of weeks and knew that chances were it would disappear just in time to get up in the morning. I laid awake from two until five tossing and turning just enough to make sure Chris was aware of my misery and couldn't get too comfortable himself. About five I decided to get up and shower and get ready for the day as I wasn't sleeping anyway and figured it might take me a little longer this morning. My back pain continued to get worse and was noticeably coming and going now. Chris, ever so hopeful, kept asking me, "Are they contractions?" And I, although not exactly sure myself, kept telling him, "No...I think it's just back pain...why don't you go ahead and go to work..." So he left for work about six and as he left I told him I just couldn't do work today. I had been diligently saving my sick days for my maternity leave but knew that today I was out of commission. I called my sub and emailed people at work telling them that I just didn't feel well and wasn't sure if it was labor pain at work but couldn't come in today. At about 6:30 in the morning I then called my mom who answered with, "Are you on your way to the hospital?" I told her that I wasn't sure if these were contractions, but it was definitely back pain that came and went and asked if she could come over and just be with me for a little while. I then proceeded to do as much as I could around the house, straightening, laundry, etc. until she arrived about eight. She now says that she was the slave driver making me walk through contractions as long as I could and having me go up and down steps as much as I could until about nine I knew I couldn't anymore. From about nine until ten we timed what we had now determined were contractions and realized that they were about five minutes apart which is when I had been told to call the doctor. Up until this point I had been trying to stay very low key and not get my hopes up, texting Chris periodically to tell him that all was well so he wouldn't get his hopes up too much. But I went ahead called the doctor and talked to a nurse who stayed on the phone with me through a contraction and realized that this truly was active labor. She immediately told me to come on in and when I asked if I could wait for my husband to get home from work she said, "No. You need to come in right away." At this point, I wasn't talking much and pretty much would just raise my hand in the air when a contraction came for my mom to do some deep tissue rubbing through the contraction. Between contractions I kept my eyes sealed tight as I was already exhausted, my mom on the other hand ran down to clear out the back of her explorer and lay the seats down for me to collapse in the back. She also called Chris and told him that the doctor had told me to come on in to the hospital and he needed to meet us there. He was pumped. All nine months he had been waiting just for this....the chance to drive fast!
By the time we got to the hospital, I was in a lot of pain. On the walk in, the sweetest older man who just happened to be an EMT visiting somebody in the hospital came to have me put my other arm around him supported now by my mom and this angel in disguise. He was precious, even timed my contractions for me as we made our way in! Chris pulled up right as we were being admitted and looked so very handsome...dad-ish even! As I was wheeled in, the nurses made a prediction just watching me handle the contractions and said, we think you're dialated to a five. Sure enough - they were exactly right! At this point, it was about 11:30. From 11:30 until about 2:00 my contractions continued to intensify and I was completely unable to talk at all. My mom and Chris were amazing. Chris stayed about six inches from my face the whole time holding my hand and helping me breathe through the pain, (He ended up with quite bruised knuckles) and my mom stayed at my back rubbing through every contraction. Annie even was able to get someone to watch her classes and came up to support by rubbing my legs between contractions and running to get mom and Chris food at one point. It gives me chills right now thinking about the level of support surrounding me. At one point, as the pain started to really intensify, Chris was breathing with me in rhythm. The only thing I was able to say for several hours was, "Do you have any gum?" He apologetically said, "Babe, I really don't think you're going to be allowed to have any gum at this point..." "No." I grimaced. "For you. Your breath smells like onions!" Annie quickly dug out five or six pieces and Chris knew well enough to shove them all in at once....MUCH better... :)
At about 2:15 I think, I knew it was time to push. I always wondered what people meant when they said they knew they had to push....well...I knew. In fact, I started telling the nurses this and when they told me to wait so they could get the doctor, I said, QUITE emphatically, "She better be RUNNING!" I'm not quite sure of the time, but it couldn't have been much after 2:30 that I was able to push. I remember pushing three times - Chris thinks four...but little Ellie Anna was READY! She arrived at 2:44pm, perfect in everyway.
My mom told me afterwards that just about a week earlier she had a dream that I was giving birth and as my little girl came out, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. In the dream, my dad was the one to deliver her and as soon as she came out, he gently slipped the cord up and away from her neck. I truly believe in my heart that my dad was representing my Heavenly Father delivering my little girl in His perfect timing...into His hands and into the world a gift. She awoke knowing that she was to pray specifically for this situation and for the health of our little girl. Sure enough, the exact situation happened. My doctor told me afterward, but the cord was around Ellie Anna's neck. Covered in prayer, my mom and Annie watched as the doctor slipped the cord off of her neck as soon as she came out. A miracle.
My miracle is starting to wake up from her nap right now, but just wanted to share the most special story of my life thus far. She is a blessing.
